Counseling Center of Cherry Creek

Blog

3 Ways To Touch Your Partner This Valentine's Day

Denver CO Couples Counseling

I hate Valentine's Day. I do, I know, it sounds weird as someone who has devoted her life to relationships...but it is true.

Valentine's Day has always felt like a contrived holiday where couples (and singles!) feel pressure to demonstrate their love and devotion to the other. Grand overtures are sweet but do not make up for the everyday work in a long-term committed marriage. I know. Bah-humbug! :-)

This year, forget the $4 Hallmark and spend time touching your partner in the places where it really counts.

#1 Touch 'em with...

Your heart. Did you know that the heart generates the largest ...

Read More →

Going To Couples Counseling? Beware of these 3 counseling pitfalls

Couples Counseling Denver CO

Sometimes I hear things like, “We went to couples therapy and it didn’t work!”

Or, “When we went to therapy, all we did was talk about the fight we had the week before — I never felt like we were getting anywhere.

Most couples engage in couples therapy because they want to change what is happening in their relationships. Working with a therapist who is skilled at doing relationship, marriage, and couples work is paramount to the process of couples therapy. If you are not sure ask questions like these:

  • What percentage of your practice ...

Read More →

Three Ways to Remodel Your Relationship

denver couples therapy

This week we started a major remodel on the kitchen and main floor of our home…moving walls, refinishing wood floors, and gutting much of the existing structure.

 

Very exciting but all of the work also feels daunting and overwhelming.

 

Like many families, we dreamed of many many changes in our 1925 home and very quickly a kitchen remodel became ...

Read More →

Women: Please Stop Having Sex Resentfully With Your Husbands

Couples Therapy Denver CO

If you are reading this, you probably know a woman, are married to a woman, or are a woman who has had sex with her partner resentfully.

It happens all of the time.

Women. Please, stop engaging in this damaging activity. 

If you are unfamiliar with the why’s and how’s of this behavior, let me explain.

For many (most!) married people (especially with children), sex changes in the first 5-7 years of their relationship...changes, like, they are not having it as much any more. Women say, “If I don’t have sex with him, he gets angry and grouchy…so it’s just easier to do it even if I don’t want to.”

As a ...

Read More →

Problems With Desire In Your Marriage? Try This Now.

Many people can easily remember the “good ‘ol days of their relationship…the early days when spontaneous and frequent sex was as routine as the morning cup of coffee. But after many years, children, mortgages, and careers, sex often begins to fade. There is more desire for sleep than there is for an orgasm with your partner.

In the post-“50 Shades of Gray” era, it is common for couples to consider spicing up their sex lives with new activities in order jump start the desire (think leather, bodices, and fantasy play). At times this may be effective but it can often lead to arguing, hurt feelings, and commentary ...

Read More →

5 Steps To Change Your Relationship

By the time most people find their way to a couple’s therapist, they have been having the same argument or fight for an average of 7 years. Seven years!

That’s seven years of repeating patterns that have not been effective in creating the kind of relationship that the couples wants. Often, when people show up in our offices they are feeling:

  • fatigued
  • hurt
  • exhausted
  • hopeless
  • angry

These feelings, in general, produce a tendency to shut down, defend, blame, and argue. And this, of course, is what has been happening at home for a long long time. There are a few simple steps, however, to help you move from where you are to where you want ...

Read More →

30 Day Sex Challenge...and 9 reasons why you aren't doing it

30 day sex challenge, help with sex in marriage

 

“We haven’t had sex in three months.”

 

“I don’t even remember that last time my husband touched me…I think it was just before the birth of our son…who is now 6 years old.”

 

“It has been 3 years since we’ve had sex…and we don’t even have any kids!”

 

Most couples get stuck and feel dissatisfied in their sex lives.

 

Meg Conley, recently posted a challenge to her readers on her blog which received national media attention. The challenge? A 30 Day Sex Challenge. You heard that right…30 days and sex (or intimate connection) 30 times.

 

Why didn’t I think of that?!

 

Oh right…because so many people that I work with want ...

Read More →