Counseling Center of Cherry Creek

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What is your drama set point?

Drama Set PointMost of you know that I just love Seth Godin. What he teaches about business is so true in the business of marriage as well.

Today, I was thinking about drama set points. We all have a set point for drama…you know, a threshold of how much we can take, how far we can push, how far we let ourselves be pushed.

I sat with a client yesterday who shared a bit about how it feels to go past this set point and enter the unchartered region of, “Holy shit did I really say/do that!?”And the post-drama agony of feeling the tremendous hurt, guilt, fear, and pain ...

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Hello, I am Siri for your relationships

Fear is the enemy of vulnerability when it comes to your relationships.Hiking across ridge | Counseling Center of Cherry Creek

Think about it…you are mad, hurt, tired, and done with your partner’s crap. You know nothing is going to change so why bother?!

Yeah, I know this story.

I also know that in this place, fear has wrapped it’s boney fingers around your tender vulnerability and is whispering in your ear, “It’s never going to change.”

There is nothing wrong with fear…fear is just a big, flashing, red light warning you, “THIS IS NEW TERRITORY! BE AWARE!” It is good and right that we have this internal warning system ...

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What Albert Einstein Knows About Relationships

Albert EinsteinAlbert Einstein famously said,

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”

True for physics.

True for relationships.

If you feel stuck in your relationship, I bet you have tried “everything”. I bet that you have consulted friends and family. Maybe you have read some books and spoken with a minister, pastor, or trusted teacher. You have done your best to look at the situation from every perspective and yet…at the end of the day…the same argument. The same hurt feelings. The same stuckness.

If you are ready to be un-stuck…if you are really ready for something to dislodge in your relationship that has ...

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Who Is Your Strategist?

relationship adviceI own my own business. Many of my clients own their own businesses as well.

When we are in business for ourselves we track things like where clients find us, what networking events to attend, what SEO strategies are increasing traffic to our websites…we do this to see what is bringing in customers and paying the bills. Many of us keep spreadsheets, pay accountants, and hire strategists and business coaches to keep us on top of investing in what is working to generate income and a livelihood.

Why is it that we suspend this kind of practical and sensible system when it comes to our ...

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The Sad, Sad Truth About Leaving a Relationship Before It Is “Done”

Relationship Therapy Denver COHow do I know if it is the “right” time to end a relationship?

When I hear this question, I think about an episode of Dr. Phil that I saw almost a decade ago while waiting at the dentist’s office. In the episode, Dr. Phil said something like, “If you are still angry, you are not ready to get divorced.” Sage advice from America’s TV Therapist.

The Anatomy of Your Relationship

Your relationship serves a purpose beyond filling your need for love, belonging, security, and comfort. Your relationship provides a valuable mirror in which you can see unhealed parts of yourself. These parts, in general, do not ...

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Will This Relationship Ever Get Better?

Counseling in Denver COMost of us think, at one time or another in our relationship, that if the other person changed everything would be better.

Most of us think, at one time or another, that if our partner was more loving, patient, kind, relaxed, driven, forgiving, etc, that our lives would be better.

Therefore, our thinking goes, because the other person is not changing, they are holding us back. If they would just change, EVERYTHING would be better.

The truth is…this often is not the case.

The person who is “holding you back” in your relationship is unlikely to be your spouse or partner. The person holding you ...

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Your Marriage: An Epic Fail?

I recently received some sage advice from a mentor, “Anything worth doing, is worth doing better.”Marriage Counseling in Denver CO

Per usual, I related these words to relationships. If you have been in a committed relationship for longer, than say, a week, chances are that you have felt like a failure at some aspect of that relationship.

The shame, guilt, and remorse of feeling like a failure in your relationship can often bring about some common responses:

1) Go into self-blame and beat yourself up feeling bad about what you have done and live in, what I call, puddle-land (like sitting in a puddle and complaining that ...

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