Counseling Center of Cherry Creek

Blog

The Opposite of Love is Not Hate, It Is Indifference

Couples Therapy Denver CO

Elie Wiesel, prolific writer and Holocaust survivor famously said, “the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference”.

If you have ever had a lover who didn’t call, a partner who ignored or rebuked your physical advances or a parent who neglected you, you know this is true.

To be unseen is to be invisible. It is to not matter. To not have value. To be meaningless. And to not exist.

Most people walk around with a corner of their psyche that already feels not good enough, that feels like a fraud or a failure, that feels unlovable, or like they do not belong anywhere.

When that wound gets activated through indifference by ...

Read More →

Talk To Your Partner About Your Fantasies

Couples Counseling Denver COIt is quite normal for you to fantasize -- about a bigger home or a smaller home...about your *dream* job...and about sexual encounters.

Fantasies are normal.

Fantasies are healthy.

Fantasies can really improve our sex lives.

Do you talk to your partner or spouse about your fantasies? Have you shared with them your deepest desires? If the answer is no, you are not alone.

Most couples never talk about their fantasies. It feels too private or too vulnerable to do so. And some fantasies may be better left in the recesses of our minds where they can be visited in private on our own. However, ...

Read More →

If It Doesn’t Burn, You Aren’t Changing

Couples Therapy Denver COI spend a fair amount of time at the gym with trainers in small group environments. I have written in the past about my love affair with CrossFit and the many metaphors with marriage counseling. This morning, there was another one.

Today I was attending a HELLth class at Endorphin (it’s my new thing) and the trainer Chris Lindley, per usual, was verbally encouraging (aka yelling at) the class to “Go Go Go!” Our legs flying on our bikes, the class of 24 women and 1 ...

Read More →

How One Thing Can Improve Everything

Meditation in Denver CO

I don’t know how many times people have said (in jest) to me in a first session, “Is there any way to improve my marriage quickly and painlessly? Can you just give me a pill?” 

Of course, we laugh knowing that there is no pill to cure our relationship ills. But…there is something that is rather extraordinary….

If you have spent any time working with me at my Denver office or online, you probably know that I am a huge proponent of meditation. Like HUGE.

We know, without a doubt, that meditation improves everything from focus to self-awareness. There is also research that suggests that meditation improves conditions such as asthma, fatigue, and cancer. The ...

Read More →

How Saying “Yes” to the Hard Stuff Helps Your Marriage

Picture of Yes | Denver CO TherapistMarriage can be tough. Hard stuff happens in our committed relationships constantly.

Notice what you do when hard stuff comes up in marriage:

  • Do you brace?
  • Does your body get tight?
  • Do you hold your breath?
  • Do you say things like, “Really?! ANOTHER thing?!”
  • Do you say things like, “Why does so much bad stuff happen to us?!”
  • Do you lash out at others or become cranky? 
  • Do you avoid by drinking, spending, or having relationships with others?

If you answer yes to any of the above, then you like are saying ‘NO’ to an aspect of your relationship and your life that has the potential to grow ...

Read More →

Seeing Mirrors: How your relationships reflect who you are

Picture of MirrorPhotographer Seokmin Ko was recently featured on CNN.com with his unique and inspiring series using mirrors. I speak, almost daily, with clients about how in relationships our partners are mirrors for us. In Ko’s work, you will notice how the mirror reflects back the environment where it is placed. You can barely make out the hands of the person holding the mirror in place as the mirror image is so strong.

Similarly, our chosen partner reflects back to us much of our own emotional landscape

which we then attribute to our partner.

What this means is that our partner reflects back to us our lovely parts as well as our not-so-favorable ...

Read More →

The Purpose of Your Marriage: It may not be what you think

Recently, at a talk that I was giving in Denver for 20 or so people, I asked, “What is the purpose of a marriage or committed relationship?” Jenny Glick | Denver CO Therapist

Their responses include:

  • To feel love
  • To have connection
  • To experience safety and intimacy
  • To grow trust
  • To have regular sex
  • To share financial responsibilities

I listed their answers on a whiteboard in one column and then I wrote the following in the adjacent column:

  • To experience intensity
  • To experience conflict
  • To grow your consciousness
  • To evolve

I asked the group, “What if the purpose of marriage and committed relationships is to create an intense container where one can experience conflict which will guide them ...

Read More →

If you have difficulty using our website, please email us or call us at (720) 457-3342
View the ADA Accessibility Statement